As most of you may know, the hosts of the Golden Globes this year are Tina Fey and Amy Poehler. As some of you may also know, from a previous post I shared, my dream is that they both become my new mommies in a formal adoption. Apparently I am not alone in this wish. Clearly I must think these woman are the sh*t. You would be right, Readers, I do. And if any of you saw last year’s Golden Globes, no one should be arguing with me. Here is some of the awesomeness that can only be manifested from this comedy duo.
One: Even though the audience will consist of a bunch of celebrities in stuffy outfits sitting at spacious dining tables, I’m sure that Fey and Poehler can turn this high school reunion into a rock concert. This would be achieved best with a stage dive from either of them, but both would be better.
Two: Another drinking game for the entire venue should definitely be in order. Of course the whole thing would be rigged and everyone would very much be wasted at the end of the night, but come on, who doesn’t want to take a swig every time there’s a callback to Ricky Gervais?
Three: On stage, Amy Poehler calls for a public reconciliation with her ex-husband Will Arnett. He stands up from the audience and proclaims that he never wants to be apart from her again. He walks up to her, whisks her into his arms, and everyone cheers. Poehler waves like the American princess she never got to be as Arnett carries her offstage. This could all totally happen.
Four: There should be a good thirty minutes devoted to a segment where Fey and Poehler attempt to recreate Bradley Cooper’s hair from American Hustle.
Five: Readers, just expect greatness, because greatness will happen this Sunday.