I was recently babysitting my friend’s 9-year-old daughter and everything she said was brilliant, so I decided to interview her. Notes in italics are mine.
How do you know when you’re in love?
When you always want to stand next to someone no matter what you’re doing. And you’re really nice to each other.
What happens when you die?
Everyone you know is sad and then you get buried and animals eat you. (Her eyes when she said the last part froze my soul.)
Why do they eat you?!
Because they have to eat something! They can’t, like, go to the store. You’re just laying there and they didn’t know you so it’s not sad to them. They’re just like “Whatever, I’m gonna eat you now.” (She is creepily delighted about this.)
Do you go to heaven?
My mom said that, but my friend told…
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